Well, now I have even more of an excuse to come home at some point...I wanna help plan the wedding! Still, I’ve been thinking lately that I want to try and stay here through Pesach....maybe even Purim, since I hear that’s the best party here. I guess we’ll see how I’m feeling in a month from now. Also, my closest friend here will be leaving at the end of February, so that’ll probably have an effect on things. I tend to get really close with one or two people when I’m in new settings, and then just spend time nurturing those relationships, so when she leaves, it’ll be pretty tough on me. But that’s alright, I have a bunch of other friends here, and the country itself is enough to keep me wanting more of it (even though right now, the cold rainy weather is kind of bothersome. But not really since it’s much-needed water, which we have to be incredibly thankful for every time it rains, considering Israel has been in a draught for three years. My friend walked into school today, and said, “ugh it’s so gross out there!” and the school’s receptionist immediately responded, “Baruch Hashem!” Ha. Love that mentality. Go Israel.)
Ezra has been here for a few days, now. It’s been really great to see him and spend time with him again. We were both kind of nervous about it, having not seen each other for almost four months, but everything feels really good and natural still, which is wonderful. We had dinner a couple of times together, and caught up on things a bit. I gave him a Chanukiah that I made for him for Chanukah, which he likes a lot. Then he went off to his Yeshivalite program, which is basically 2 weeks of learning, here in Har Nof. So I haven’t seen him since a couple of days ago, though on the phone he sounds like he’s enjoying it mostly. Things feel really great with that right now, and I still can’t get over how incredible it is that he came here at all.
Chanukah has been amazing so far. It really is so beautiful here in Israel. Just walking down the street, seeing lit Chanukiot in every window...I get all emotional just looking at them. I thought maybe this is how Christians feel in America, seeing Christmas decorations everywhere...but I’m not sure it’s quite the same. I guess I wouldn’t really know, but now that I’ve learned all the deeper meanings behind the lights and what they mean and what the whole holiday symbolizes, I feel such a deep and intense connection to it, more than I ever have before. One of my favorite teachers likes to remind us often that there is no such thing as symbolism in Judaism. We don’t do anything as a “ritual” or to “remember” something. The things we do: the candles we light, the songs we sing, the blessings we make, they are not symbols, but rather living realities. Each time we do them we are bringing more of that reality into ourselves, our lives, and our worlds. We are re-inspiring ourselves with that same light that’s been burning in the windows and the hearts of our families for millennia. Our candles don’t “represent” the light from the Beit Hamikdash, the Holy Temple. They are that light, in a very real, tangible way. The energy has lived on, and will continue to until the very end. We learned that in the Temple, they had to re-build the Menorah every single day – the high priest had to actually remove the tops of the branches, clean out the oil, and replace them again each and every morning, effectively building a brand new menorah each time. This is considered strange, since we are told that the loaves of bread stayed fresh for a week miraculously, and that the special aromatic spices only needed to be changed once a year. So why didn’t we just get miraculously clean oil every day? Because this way, the light would always feel new and energetic. It was to teach us that just as the menorah is rebuilt and rejuvenated each day, so too we must do that with ourselves, keep each new day exciting and fresh for ourselves. I just find that so beautiful, and when I look in those windows, and see hundreds of Chanukiot lit each night as I pass by building after building on the bus ride to wherever I am heading, I think of that energy, and how we are all connected, and how we all still have that light, no matter how religious we are, or what we believe in, we still light those candles, and still feel that warm glowing inexplicable energy between us each night of Chanukah. Sorry to get all mushy on you. I guess I’ve been feeling pretty inspired by it all. I haven’t gotten any “presents” over Chanukah this year, (other than a really awesome melodic phone call from my Dad, and Ezra being here, which is a pretty big one, and of course, a whole new sister!! So actually, I have gotten some pretty sweet gifts, and I’ve still got three more nights!) and yet it’s been probably the best Chanukah I’ve ever had. Who needs more stuff when you’ve got this yummy internal warmth invigorating your every moment and relationship? Needless to say, I feel really, really good.
I also wanted to write a little bit about something we did yesterday at school that I think really shows what a great learning environment I am in. One of my good friends here’s grandmother just passed away over last Shabbat back in New York, and her parents already were planning on coming here to visit, so when that happened, her mother decided to come a few days earlier, right after the funeral. Since she is not religious, she chose not to sit shiva for her mother, since she felt it would help her more to be here with her daughter, anyway. This is her first time in Israel, and her first real glimpse into this world that her daughter has found so much happiness in. So the head of my school, Rebbetzin Pavlov, turned her mother’s visit into something neither she, nor any of us, will ever forget. She offered her a chance to sit shiva for her mother, just for a day while she’s here, in the Pavlovs’ living room (they live right above the school), and the whole school took turns going up and sitting with her. Rebbetzin Pavlov also gave a shiur right there in her living room to all of us, as well as to her, about the Jewish view of death and mourning, and the purpose of shiva, and just general comforting and inspiring words. Since most of the girls in the school come from completely secular homes, many of them had never been to a shiva before, nor did they know what it was even all about. Even I, who grew up in modern orthodox surroundings and have been to several shivas, have never actually been taught about it in a straightforward way: why we do what we do, say what we do, act like we do. So really, it was an incredible learning opportunity for all of us, as well as an immense gift to her mother, who kept saying over and over again how much she appreciated it, and felt so grateful to all of us and to the school for doing that for her. She had never met any of us before, had never been in Israel before, and certainly not in a religious setting like this one before, and here we were, treating her like family, and insisting that as a Jewish woman, she truly is part of our family. Rebbetzin Pavlov even said in her lesson, “we are not here to comfort a stranger. We are here to comfort our cousin, our aunt, our sister, our mother. And that is what any shiva is really about.” It was really incredibly moving, and I learned so much today, both philosophically and practically. By the end of the day, every single student and staff member had gone upstairs to be with my friend’s mother, and talk with her, and hear about what her grandmother had been like. I think this is a huge credit to my school, and really shows what kind of an institution it is. We don’t just learn abstract ideas; we learn about life, about relationships, about how to treat those you love as well as those you’ve never met before, and we learn to really put those concepts into action.
So, there you have it. Marriage and mourning, all in one blog post. What will she come up with next?
Shabbat Shalom, everyone! Happy Chanukah!
Love, Shira
PS AHHHHH DAVID AND DANIELLE ARE ENGAGED!!!!!
